How are you? Since we never formally introduced ourselves, let me say that I am the mother of the adorable 20 month old boy that lives above you. I am taking the time during his nap today to reach out and express my feelings about our recent unpleasant exchanges.
First off, I am sincerely sorry that the noise my son creates is causing your living space to be less than comfortable. No, really, I am. I am especially sorry when he launches his rocket off of the sink counter and then crash lands it on the floor. That shit is loud.
I am also sorry for when he throws his SuperGrover remote control from high heights like his changing table. I hate that too and wish he wouldn’t do it.
I am not sorry however, that my son walks and runs around his home. Nor am I sorry for his penchant of pushing his “baby” around in his stroller or even for his singing in that God awful Merryoke microphone his Grannie gave him for Christmas.
I am sorry that you chose to purchase and then completely remodel (which I never complained out BTW) your apartment without first asking who lived above you. I am also sorry that your lack of empathy is such that intermittent toddler noise from 8am-8pm causes you to rampage out and slam the door in my overly considerate husband’s face.
I am sorry that your behavior has caused me to already withdraw my future invitation to use our roof deck during the summer (I make REALLY good margaritas FYI). I was also thinking of making you biscotti as a peace offering. That gesture has clearly passed.
I am sorry you decided to make your home in New York City, where people literally live on top of one another and children’s homes are indeed their “playgrounds.” If you require absolute quiet in your home during all daytime hours I suggest you look into moving to the country, Thoreau style. In addition, if you like to work from home, might I suggest frequenting the two dozen coffee shops in our neighborhood. Wifi is free now.
Finally, I am most sorry for the karma that is to befall upon you should you decide to have children someday. Given your current attitudes toward my son I realize this scenario is unlikely, but it makes me smile nonetheless.
Have a great weekend!
Your 5th floor neighbors